“Why lockdown has made me realise I want to live alone”

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“Why lockdown has made me realise I want to live alone”
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“The pandemic has made me realise I want to live alone:'

The truth is: it is still just a dream, because it’s all a lie.I don’t really rent this place on my own. My two flat mates have continued to pay their share while they spend lockdown at their family homes in Ireland. One of them expects to return in autumn, while the other has decided she’s not coming back at all. I still have a landlord who could kick me out at any time, which, considering the uncertain economic crisis, feels like a bigger possibility each day.

That’s why I’ve been investing in it more, emotionally and financially, with little pick-me-ups for the place. What used to feel like a room in a flatshare now feels like a home, one that I’m proud of.You can see why it’s been so easy for me to run with my own lie, but it’s time to face reality: I’m still a tenant in a flatshare. I need to find a flatmate to fill the empty room – a daunting prospect considering it will have to be done while sticking to social distancing rules.

Look, I know I’m in a much more privileged position than most. And I should point out that my flatmates are very lovely. “What are you moaning about?” I hear some people cry. But it’s made me realise that, after 13 years of flat sharing, I’ve had enough.couldn’t cover the deposit for a Lego house in Zone 50, it’s made me question my next move.

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