Childhood trauma leaves an indelible mark of fear on its victims. As a result, adults who have experienced traumatic events in childhood are terrified of relaying such incidents and avoid any event or circumstance that might remind them or make them repeat the situation.
Consequently, if left untreated, this affects the individual’s ability to have a sound and healthy relationship with a partner. Several studies have found that adults who had a traumatic childhood suffered from feelings of mistrust and fear, among others. This may lead to one of the reasons for divorce or separation.
Obosi says, “Individuals can grow up having not resolved those traumatic experiences they have had. Once that happens, it becomes difficult to emotionally adjust because they keep remembering some of those incidents and this will affect their relationship with people, their ability to trust someone and the choice of places they want to go or things they want to do.”
Toogun notes, “Some traumatic experiences could be due to the following; loss of a loved one, abuse , bullying, dysfunctional family, poor parent-child relationship, war, poverty, medical condition, divorce by parents etc.”It is important to identify the extent of the impact the trauma has on your partner as this will help to know and administer the right approach and help.
Togun further says, “You should assure him/her that you will be with them throughout the process of their healing and ask how he/she thinks you can be of help.”Also, Obosi advises partners of persons who have had a traumatic childhood to encourage them to speak with a mental health specialist to get therapy.
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